Man and woman

Man is most firm – woman the most flexible.

Man is the straightest – woman the most bending.

Man stands steadfast – woman gently trips.

Man surveys and observes – woman glances and feels.

Man is serious – woman is gay.

Man is the tallest and broadest – woman less and taper.

Man is rough and hard – woman smooth and soft.

Man is brown – woman is fair.

Man is wrinkly – woman is less so.

The hair of man is more strong and short – of woman more long and pliant.

The eyebrows of man are compressed – of woman less frowning.

Man has most convex lines – woman most concave.

Man has most straight lines – woman most curved.

The countenance of man, taken in profile, is more seldom perpendicular than that of woman.

Man is most angular – woman most round.

J.C. Lavater (1775)


7 thoughts on “Man and woman

  1. Here’s a few more:

    Men go into stores to buy what they need. Women shop.

    Men surf away from commercials. Women watch Commercials and enjoy them.

    Men change oil every three thousand miles. Women change break pads.

    Men buy drinks for women. Women buy sweaters for men.

    A single man will cook up three times as much food as he needs and eat it every day for a week. A single woman will go to the butcher shop and buy one chicken breast.

    Men fantasize about having multiple sex partners. Women fantasize about having multiple pairs of shoes.

    A man thinks thinks there is nothing about owning two identical fishing rods. A woman thinks there is nothing odd about owning two identical pairs of black boots.

  2. that’s great stuff, Beast!

    the first one, in particular, should be copyrighted: im sure sooner or later it’ll be in some ad

    just yesterday i was looking at my girlfriend’s disturbing amount of shoes; in fact, the disturbing thing is not even that they are so many, but that she actually only wears a tiny percentage of it: probably 10%, 15%. maybe that should be my argument with her: look, i dont want to actually sleep with other women, but can i just keep them in the cupboard? you know, just for show, like you do with shoes…

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